Take the Situation Seriously, But Not Yourself
Okay, so the process of “ego elimination” has been the topic of discussion by theologians, philosophers, psychologists, mystics, and other scholarly “bodies” for centuries. Consequently, I’m not going to share anything of massive new insight, nor am I going to go into the details of “all the ways” one might look at ego elimination.
However, I do know one thing. Our egos really like the status quo. And, they REALLY like being right about that. Consequently, doing the best job we can to eliminate (or at least mitigate) our ego’s attempts to limit us is a good thing when we look at innovative change and jumping!
Therefore, I’ve developed a process to “set the tone” that egos are not welcome during my workshops.
In every workshop I lead, I start with a series of agreements together by which I will facilitate the activities. Notice, I intentionally call them “agreements together,” not ground rules. The term “agreements together” invokes positive images (both words are positive), while the more common term, “ground rules,” creates images that are negative, maybe even punitive. Words matter. Choosing the right words is a powerful component in ensuring the best possible outcomes using JUMP!.
Okay, back to the agreements together I use. One of the agreements is this: We’ll focus on what’s right, not who’s right. In other words, take the situation seriously, but not yourself.
As such, I disallow speech-making and positioning that is designed to prove that one person is right about something at the expense of someone else. No win/lose situations allowed. Instead, I force the workshop participants to look at the situation as being primary—to describe “what” needs to be done.
We’ll get to assigning some accountabilities for the doing part of the project later. However, insecure types tend to be more interested in appearing to be important than in being interested in doing important things.
Remember – maybe it’s simple, and maybe it’s obvious, but if you’re spending a significant amount of time and energy making sure “someone is taking ME seriously here”, then your ego is speaking loud and clear.
